Baseball Toaster Bronx Banter
What's a Matter? You Ascared?
2006-11-01 05:00
by Alex Belth

I'm not much for Halloween but I know some people who absolutely love it. An ex-girlfriend couldn't wait for it to come around each year and she'd spend weeks preparing what she'd wear. To me, it's like New Year's Eve in that it is Amateur Night in NYC. But hey, I'm a snob, and to be truthful, Halloween has a lot of redeeming values that New Year's Eve doesn't, like all the great costumes.

I remember being terrified on Halloween as a teenager. If you didn't go out, you were a wus. So I'd go out with a band of friends. We dreaded running into older kids, but we always did. At which point they'd pelt us with eggs, and shaving cream, and pound us with socks filled with flower (we heard rumors that some kids has socks filled with quarters but never actually saw them). Lots of nervous anticipation and lots of running. And for what?

Last night was unseasonably warm in New York. I saw clusters of little kids in their outfits--a fat kid wearing a Darth Vader costume, and his fat father wearing the helmet next to him. As I approached my apartment building I saw three skinny teenage boys walking quickly. They looked nervous. One was talking into his cell phone. "Nah, you better stay about from 231st street--they're throwing eggs down there." Man, I wouldn't go back to being a teenager for all the tea in China.

2006-11-01 06:51:10
1.   Chyll Will
Halloween's not what it used to be. I'm not old, but I saw the transition to the ugly side of Halloween as a teen. My family used to be one of the fun stops for kids who not only got candy, but cider and donuts and a few jokes or two. That dwindled when people started putting Tylenol and razor blades in the candy, and came to complete stop when I was attacked by a roving gang of egg-throwers, one of whom hit me directly in the left eye and blinded me for several weeks. I almost would have preferred being shot by a .22, which was also becoming a tradition believe it or not.

It's not Halloween itself that is miserable, it's the cretins who insist on making it miserable for everyone else. I miss collecting for UNICEF and stopping at the fun stops and going home to rummage through the haul, but nowadays it seems like most people would rather be the homeland equivelent of terrorists.

2006-11-01 07:04:38
2.   jakewoods
you wouldnt want to peg some kids with eggs and then use some shaving cream???

while thats fun i just miss the random candy.

2006-11-01 07:12:25
3.   Chyll Will
2 Shaving cream was fun. Eggs were not because of the random chance someone's aim was on-point, which happened. Candy was what it was all about, but somewhere along the line, the fun was forcibly stripped away; just like hip-hop.
2006-11-01 09:05:19
4.   ChuckM
There were also the legendary eggs filled with shaving cream which were rumored to have Nair in them as well. Nothing liek having someone crack a shaving cream filled egg on the back of your head and worrying that your hair was gonna fall out...

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