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I Don't Want Him, You Can Have Him, He's too Fat for Me
2006-02-01 07:05
by Alex Belth
Note: The Bronx Banter blog has moved to bronxbanterblog.com.

Okay, that's a diss, and I don't really mean it like that. But it's a Honeymooner's quote, and yo, I'm happy that ol' Rubes got a chance to stick around some more. Hey, better in Minnie than in the BX, right?

Comments (52)
Show/Hide Comments 1-50
2006-02-01 07:30:21
1.   Cliff Corcoran
Right.
2006-02-01 07:31:07
2.   Sliced Bread
Without a headstart, Ruben probably can't get around on a genuine fastball anymore, but he can still make breaking ballers pay for their mistakes.
Rivera and Farnsworth should be able to contain him without difficulty, Villone better be careful, and after that, I'm afraid Guidry might be the best option.

See the piece on Johnny Talk Show in the NY Times today? He did a radio interview with David Lee Roth? I imagine they laughingly commiserated about their shared 'rock star' experience of being replaced by inferior talents (see Sammy Hagar and Coco Crisp).

The more ingratitude Damon receives from Red Soxburgh, the more I like him (but not yet).

2006-02-01 07:39:44
3.   bp1
So - who's gonna be Cano's mentor this year?

I like Ruben. He's a "lug", but in a good way. His time has passed, but I'll miss him and those bright red silk suits just the same. Too bad his style spoke louder than his bat last year. I wish him well in Minny.

Re: "Johnny Talk Show". Man - you guys are too freaking funny.

BP

2006-02-01 07:40:34
4.   rbj
I'll wait on Damon until the season starts. And it definitely was time for Reuben to move on.
2006-02-01 08:03:19
5.   Ben
Chili Davis, Tim Raines, Luis Sojo, Ruban-Ruban. I love those clubhouse guys. Who's filling that role now? Not Bernie I hope, sweet sweet Bernie, a chatterbox he ain't.

Well, who knows, maybe he can push the flakiness to unparalleled heights.

What? two weeks to go? Can't wait

2006-02-01 08:11:38
6.   Dimelo
The Yanks have Tony Pena to keep things loose.
2006-02-01 08:13:50
7.   vockins
I liked Reuben a lot, even though he had no business playing on the team last year. Big guy could hustle to first sometimes!
2006-02-01 08:25:35
8.   standuptriple
Hustle? Yeah he hustled, but it didn't do much good. It was/is Ruben's time to go.
Don't forget about Bowa. He should spice up the clubhouse a bit.
I'm actually excited to see how Guidry prepares the staff. Does that make me offically baseball-insane-O?
2006-02-01 08:27:14
9.   Ben
I like the coaching staff, too. But it can't replace a veteran player busting A-rod's chops or doing the old matsui hair swipe and cap fit.
2006-02-01 08:30:20
10.   wsporter
I think that bad hammy had a lot to do with slowing Ruben's bat last year. Despite that, without that head start I'm not sure Rubey can get around on A. Small's heater let alone J. Wright's. I think we can find the guys to handle him. Would anyone have believed 8 or 9 years ago that we would talk about the "village idiot" as a positive clubhouse influence? Talk about a guy who turned it around. I hope he hit's the cover off the ball out there, except of course when we show up.
2006-02-01 08:50:39
11.   Simone
I wish Big Rube well.
2006-02-01 08:56:26
12.   Sliced Bread
Right on, Dimelo and standuptriple. With the additions of Pena, Gator, and Damon to the clubhouse, I see the Yanks letting their hair down a little, and playing a little looser this season.
Guidry should be a great resource for Randy Johnson, Villone, Myers, (Leiter?) as he is fluent in the language of lefties, hell, it's his native tongue.
Today's NY Times piece on Johnny Broadway emphasizes Damon's friendship with 'frat brother' Giambi. Two guys like them are usually more fun than one.
I liked reading that Damon recently went to dinner with Rodriguez, and didn't he play golf with Jeter, Posada, and a few other Yanks recently?
Matsui got the Yankee re$pect he de$erve$ this winter, Bernie will be zen in his new role leading the rhythm section, Sheff will step up with even more urgency (as if that's possible) in his walk year.
I don't anticipate any clashes of egos, or clubhouse tension, or acrimony this season.
Pena and Posada will be the go-to guys for the Latin Yanks like Cano, Escalona, and, uh, Bubba Crosby!

Of course nothing squashes the lighthearted clubhouse levity like being swept by the Royals, or hacking and wheezing to an 11-19 start, but we know that ain't gonna happen this year, right?
RIGHT?!
2006-02-01 09:36:26
13.   Zack
"Damon's shoe company, Puma, will present him with a $245,000 Ferrari today. "

You know, it just isn't fair. Its not like the guy can't already afford one, why not give ME a Ferrari??? Hell, I actually have room to drive the thing where I am.

2006-02-01 09:46:42
14.   murphy
sliced, don't MAKE me start a Van Halen/Van Hagar battle up in here!
2006-02-01 09:50:17
15.   Dimelo
Sliced, doesn't it bug you that we've heard more from Damon's mouth since he signed than we've heard from Jeter, Mariano and Bernie combined in the last year? I wish Damon would just SHUT-THE-EFF-UP already. He's starting to annoy me with his Red Sox whining already. He sounds like David Wells did last year. He's talking about the Red Sox getting their man (Coco), why does he care? He made a choice and came to the Yankees, what does he want the Red Sox to do? To sit and cry like a petulant child because they lost Damon. They already do enough of that - except, of course, according to Gammons they don't. Ball players akin to Damon are better seen and not heard. His marble mouth and not so well thought out sentences need to be curbed. What he should have asked ARod is what PR firm he uses and then use whoever is their direct competitor - because ARod's PR firm sucks so whoever the competitor might be must be much better.
2006-02-01 10:05:50
16.   Sliced Bread
For some reason, I'm not bothered by Damon's blathering. As long as he delivers on the field, and doesn't say anything to disrupt the team, he can co-host "The View" for the next 4 years for all I care.
I like that he's embracing NY, and the media. I prefer the quiet type of athlete, who lets their game do the talking, but I can appreciate a ballplayer who's an open book -- granted Johnny's brand of open book ain't exactly Tolstoy.
2006-02-01 10:07:48
17.   outdoorminer
Alex, you do know that Alice was referecing the Andrews Sisters' song, "Too Fat Polka," right? Also... Van Halen trumps Van Hagar, anytime, anywhere, any day.
2006-02-01 10:14:45
18.   pistolpete
"I don't anticipate any clashes of egos, or clubhouse tension, or acrimony this season."

Sliced, I think another great 'feel good' quality to this past offseason is that George didn't go on a complete rampage and start dealing major players on the team, simply because they didn't win a championship. If you expect any sort of harmony in a clubhouse, you've also got to let guys have some familiarity with each other.

End of 2003 into 2004 comes to mind - half our pitching staff was overturned, not to mention Soriano for A-Rod. Too many major changes every year may pacify the owner and even some fans, but you can't expect players to form any kind of relationship when they're constantly looking over their shoulder at the owner or GM...

2006-02-01 10:20:48
19.   Start Spreading the News
Do we really want Ruben Sierra (career OBP: .316) to be mentoring Cano who walked 16 times in over 500 ABs last year?

Cano needs to learn patience while he is still young. We don't want a repeat of Soriano who averaged 30 walks a year for us. Cano is not going to hit 40 homers by swinging freely as Soriano did. So find him someone who can teach him to draw a walk. Does Giambi speak spanish?

2006-02-01 10:21:34
20.   pistolpete
"Does Giambi speak spanish?"

No, but Cano speaks English. ;-)

2006-02-01 11:14:46
21.   Cliff Corcoran
Is anyone else horrified by DLR's show on 92.3? Turns out Diamond Dave's just a normal guy and even a little boring. Tremendously disappointing. Where's the oversexed, hyperactive jive-talker we used to love?
2006-02-01 11:15:42
22.   The Mick 536
He wasn't Johnny Mize or even Cliff Johnson. You can have him and the wind he generated by his big swings that missed.

Sliced. On Guidry. During the second season in 1980, Leach decked Reggie three times. When Gator didn't retaliate, Reggie returned to the field and acted like he wouldn't play any balls hit to him. Lemon wouldn't order Gator to retaliate, saying it was a personal thing. Question: Do Reggie, the Spring batting advisor, and Gator talk with one another? Will Gator order a pitcher to retaliate, say when Timlin hits Jeter?

2006-02-01 11:15:45
23.   The Mick 536
He wasn't Johnny Mize or even Cliff Johnson. You can have him and the wind he generated by his big swings that missed.

Sliced. On Guidry. During the second season in 1980, Leach decked Reggie three times. When Gator didn't retaliate, Reggie returned to the field and acted like he wouldn't play any balls hit to him. Lemon wouldn't order Gator to retaliate, saying it was a personal thing. Question: Do Reggie, the Spring batting advisor, and Gator talk with one another? Will Gator order a pitcher to retaliate, say when Timlin hits Jeter?

2006-02-01 11:16:07
24.   The Mick 536
He wasn't Johnny Mize or even Cliff Johnson. You can have him and the wind he generated by his big swings that missed.

Sliced. On Guidry. During the second season in 1980, Leach decked Reggie three times. When Gator didn't retaliate, Reggie returned to the field and acted like he wouldn't play any balls hit to him. Lemon wouldn't order Gator to retaliate, saying it was a personal thing. Question: Do Reggie, the Spring batting advisor, and Gator talk with one another? Will Gator order a pitcher to retaliate, say when Timlin hits Jeter?

2006-02-01 11:17:43
25.   The Mick 536
Sliced. By the way, Gator plays the drums.
2006-02-01 11:38:55
26.   Sliced Bread
Mick 536, That's a good question about Gator, and I didn't know he plays the drums. They can bring back Paul O'Neil and jam with Bernie.
I didn't remember Reggie Beaning Day, 25 summers ago, but now that you mention it, it sounds familiar, and certainly sounds like vintage Reggie.
I imagine (or at least hope) Mr. October has put that behind him, and has forgiven Guidry for not firing back.
I think Guidry and Torre will leave the retaliating up to the pitchers. Nobody will be coerced to strike back, and nobody will have to remind Farnsworth or Sturtze to "protect" the Yankee hitters. Villone seems like a guy who'll get his uniform dirty, too. I read a quote from him the other day in which he said he'll do anything for the team, even offered to come in and lay down a bunt if Torre wants.
2006-02-01 11:42:56
27.   Zack
Hey, if someone wants to be the mouthpiece of this team, I am all for it. Damon will fill the void left by Cone, a smart media man (I mean that as in smart with the media, not nec. a smart, media man, if you follow) who the reporters can go to for quotes and who will take the pressure off, say, A-Rod, who clearly can't figure it out. Jeter, leader that he may be, has never been comfortable as a team spokesman.

I say, blab away Johnny-boy, and make this a more enjoyable team to follow!

2006-02-01 11:44:41
28.   Zack
Don't we all miss the days of Graham "the enforcer" Lloyd? I still have visions of him flying out of the bullpen about 3 minutes late, swinging wildly at everyone in his path during the O's brawl. Ahhh, those were the days...
2006-02-01 11:45:03
29.   bp1
To bad we can't carry a designated "Quantrill" on the roster just for the purpose of the occasional message pitch. Q sucked pretty badly last year, but you gotta love the sack he showed against Detroit.

BP

2006-02-01 12:07:37
30.   Oscar Azocar
Yes, that O's brawl. I'll always remember Darryl getting around the scrum to get a cheap shot at the back of Benitez's head.
2006-02-01 12:10:45
31.   KYK
So I saw this in the Star Ledger (nj.com), in a story about Cano sitting out the WBC.

>Cano, who was runner-up for AL Rookie of the Year in 2005,
>admitted he needs to improve his focus.

>"Sometimes I get lazy, but I'm going to get better this year."

Sounds like he hears the criticism and wants to work on it.
Comment?

2006-02-01 12:16:51
32.   Marcus
Re: Cano's laziness

I think most of that criticism came from Torre and the coaching staff, so I think it's good that he's recognized it as a problem. Overall Cano seems more coachable than Soriano, so that's a plus. I realize that is just an impression I have, and it may be wrong, but my hope is we won't have to watch him make the same mistakes over and over again. That swing-and-a-miss at every breaking ball away got really tiring with Soriano.

2006-02-01 12:23:04
33.   Dimelo
Cliff, you need to get serious, I mean SIRIUS. Today Howard had on Jenna Jamison; she was naked and using some contraption so she can achieve a nice BIG "O". It made for a very pleasant ride in to work this morning. Definitely better than DLR.
2006-02-01 12:36:18
34.   pistolpete
"Cliff, you need to get serious, I mean SIRIUS. Today Howard had on Jenna Jamison; she was naked and using some contraption so she can achieve a nice BIG "O". It made for a very pleasant ride in to work this morning. Definitely better than DLR. "

I listen to O&A on XM - much funnier show IMO, plus with XM you get all the baseball games... :)

2006-02-01 12:44:38
35.   Dimelo
Pistolpete, It's a matter of taste. I never liked O&A. The Yankees have a pretty strong signal on 880 AM, so the baseball factor doesn't bug me much. At work I get MLB radio, that's steramed via the web. At home the baseball package gives me my fair share of baseball games. SIRIUS allows me to enjoy NCAA B-Ball, NFL Football, the Knicks, Backspin (old school hip-hop), Spanish stations (good ol reggaethon, merengue, salsa).

Other than the sports package and the personalities, both XM and Sirius aren't much different.

2006-02-01 13:17:39
36.   pistolpete
You're right - as far as the music channels, it's six of one, 1/2 dozen of the other. All the same genres and channels on both services. People usually make their decision based on sports or the talk show personalities...

Sure, you can hear the Yanks on 880, but there's an awful lot of transplanted fans all over this great nation who don't get a clear signal on their local affiliate, or don't have a local affiliate at all. How great is it to be able to sit at a Yankees game with your XM MyFi and switch over to the Sox broadcast LIVE and see what's going on? AFAIK, Sirius's portable unit only allows you to record content, not listen to it as it happens...

And IMO, baseball's always been a better sport for radio - football is primarily a TV sport, as it's played on a Sunday afternoon - during the fall & winter- when everyone is usually home anyway... Baseball's a 'summer thing' to me - nothing better than cranking up Sterling while grilling some burgers and downing a few brews in the yard.

...And you're actually bragging about being able to hear the Knicks? ;-)

2006-02-01 13:48:36
37.   vockins
The only thing going right for the Knicks is that the Nets aren't in Brooklyn yet.
2006-02-01 13:52:29
38.   standuptriple
I'm an XMer as well. The MLB Homeplate actually made me handle the pickup of Bowa a lot easier than if I hadn't listened to him on a regular basis all of last season. He's not the same maniac that I saw on highlights of Phillie games.
I agree, baseball translates much better to radio than any other sport. It's virtually impossible to get my Yankee fix out in CA. XM has relieved that jones.
2006-02-01 14:24:11
39.   Dimelo
The Knicks make for some good comedy. I wasn't bragging about them....they are still my team though. Even if the Nets were to come to Brooklyn, I could never embrace them. As far as basketball is concerned, NY will always be a Knick town.

I don't know if switching over to the Sox broadcast would be a big selling point for XM. Castiglione and Tripiano with their "waaaay back, waaaay back, waaaay back, caught at the wall by Sheffield" would only serve as comic relief. I do think they are good to listen to, but I hate hearing them bust all over themselves when the Sawx are beating on the Royals. I do agree baseball translates well on the radio, but usually when I'm spending a ton of time at the ski resorts come December then listening to a 4 o'clock Giant game on Sirius makes the ride more pleasant - unless, of course, Feely is missing field goals to win the game.

2006-02-01 14:35:39
40.   Dimelo
Alex B. has another piece on SI, this one is about the Mets new sports network. I have no ill-will towards Met fans but they sure got a problem with Alex writing about the Mets. Check out some of their pissy comments:
http://www.metsblog.com/blog/_archives/2006/2/1/1739379.html

Here's the link to the SI piece.
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2006/writers/alex_belth/02/01/sny.mets/index.html

Good job, Alex. I did love this line:

After Tom Seaver, Ed Kranepool and a handful of others, there isn't much to lionize over the course of a full hour. What are they going to feature? The Art Shamsky Report, Late Night with Ron Swoboda, Fly Fishing with Kevin McReynolds, and Hot Dog Highlights starring Willie Montanez and Lenny Dykstra?

2006-02-01 15:11:00
41.   murphy
i love XM. Between MLB and O&A (blows stern out of the water), it's unbeatable.
2006-02-01 15:47:53
42.   Levy2020
Anyone see that the MLB picked Toronto to win the division this year? debris was just distracting us the whole time!

http://mlb.mlb.com/NASApp/mlb/news/article_perspectives.jsp?ymd=20060131&content_id=1304062&vkey=perspectives&fext=.jsp

I think Glaus is already on the downside, and Overbay is on a cusp. . . But how could anyone pay that much money for BJ Ryan. I think the Ryan-Farnsworth-Gordon ERAs will be closer to each other than to Rivera or even to Wagner, no?

2006-02-01 15:48:14
43.   Levy2020
Shoot. Sorry about the long URL! I forgot and now I can't go back and fix it!
2006-02-01 16:26:56
44.   wsporter
http://www.allheadlinenews.com/articles/7002196029

Did anyone else see this over at WasWatching? Yippee, now we're going to have room for even more of these 'Richard' Heads at the "new" Yankee Stadium. I'm sure there is an adequate adjective somewhere in the language with which to describe this heap of bovine after-birth but I can't quite seem to come up with it. Larry David is right, "you just can't leave the house".

Speaking of adequate adjectives, are people really paying to hear some broad fake an orgasm on the radio? What a country. What's next? Defecation-dial-a-date? Or have I already miss that one?

2006-02-01 17:25:18
45.   vockins
//As far as basketball is concerned, NY will always be a Knick town.//

I think you're right, but they're sure doing their damnedest to test that theory.

2006-02-01 17:40:12
46.   Simone
Being a Yankee doesn't change my opinion that Johnny Damon is and always has been a doofus. Puma gave him a Ferrari. The richer just get richer, while hardworking people can't get a finacial break.
2006-02-01 18:07:54
47.   Andre
Did anyone else see the ESPN Insider report that Pettitte may be coming back to the Yanks in '07? I don't subscribe to Insider so I don't know if it's just a tease, but Pettitte was one of my favorite Yanks and I would love to see him back. Even if his skills have declined a bit, I think the guy always gave his best effort.

One of the best things about CBS 880 is that I can pick it up in my car in the burbs of Boston. It gets static-y in places, but I still love the fact that I can hear Yanks games for free on the ride home from work.

2006-02-01 18:37:34
48.   Dimelo
I just Damon would shut up already. He's getting annoying already. Why did I find the last sentence, in the bottom 3 paragraphs, very disturbing?

Damon had always heard from others around the game that Steinbrenner held him in high regard, and he started to believe it after that quick conversation. "He was very cordial, very impressed, which led me to believe that was a big reason why he picked me this offseason," Damon said. "He said he respected the way I approached the game." They spoke again on the phone after Damon signed with the Yankees just before Christmas and Steinbrenner "was very delighted with my decision," Damon said.

Now they get the chance to celebrate in person together, and Damon is hoping to make his new boss proud, beginning with that new clean-cut haircut of his.

"It's great to be on his side," he said, "so now we can talk about the Yankee way."

http://www.newsday.com/sports/baseball/yankees/ny-spyanks0202,0,4055480.story?coll=ny-sports-headlines

2006-02-01 20:22:40
49.   Simone
Does George put something in the water once players sign up? Because now I'm beginning to find Damon scary or maybe it is the Yankees. In any case, enough already Damon.
2006-02-02 00:17:10
50.   Ravenscar
Regarding some previous posts:

I definitely prefer XM to Sirius because of the baseball - as far as music and content, there are positives and negatives to each. Also, I know this isn't really the place for the debate but I'd sooner drink paint than listen to that monkey Stern scratch himself all over the radio. The sound of my cat snoring provides me more thought-provoking material. And I've worked at Sirius.

As far as the metsblog boys' reactions to Alex's article, it's understandable. I read everything Alex does, and am a huge fan of BronxBanter AND a Mets fan. But his tone was a little petulant and overkill for making fun of such an easy target from the position of YES excess. Also, I can't imagine if Matthew Cerrone makes fun of the confluence of the 1,000th showing of Jeter's jump throw intersecting with the 10,000th use of the word "intangibles" when describing his career everyone here will be all that full of laughter and light.

For the record, I thought it about YES and I think it about the new stupid Mets network: TOO MUCH. Just another way to suck more money out of the fans. Sad. Unless I get to watch some random mid-season games from all the 4th-place years, when I learned to love the Mets circa 1978.

Lastly, I agree with whomever said you guys don't really want him mentoring Cano. Yikes. Let him ruin Justin Morneau. Bat-girl's going to have a field day with him.

Show/Hide Comments 51-100
2006-02-02 00:18:38
51.   Ravenscar
"Him" being Ruben Sierra.
2006-02-02 09:44:59
52.   jkay
Lotsa luck!

http://www.startribune.com/509/story/217625.html

Twins sold on Sierra's clout

In veteran Ruben Sierra, the Twins are adding a switch hitter with a good history of success in the Metrodome.

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